Almost something
After our last conversation, we drifted apart again.
By then, I was used to it.
Talking to him felt a little like listening to a song that kept getting paused halfway through.
Just when I thought it was starting, it would stop.
Then one day, completely out of nowhere, he sent me a song.
No explanation.
No context.
Just a song.
I listened to it, liked the message, and left it at that.
I didn't know what else to say.
A few days later, he sent another one.
This time, I replied.
"How are you? Is everything okay?"
It was a simple question.
But somehow, that question changed everything.
The conversation didn't end after a few messages.
It continued.
Then it continued the next day.
And the day after that.
And somehow, without either of us planning it, we started talking every day.
Looking back, I don't think I realized how unusual that was.
At first, I still wasn't interested in him romantically.
At least, that's what I kept telling myself.
I just liked talking to him.
I liked having someone to share random thoughts with.
Someone who understood my references.
Someone who replied.
Someone who stayed.
Most of the time.
The funny thing is, I wasn't even a particularly good texter.
I would reply hours later.
Sometimes accidentally.
Sometimes intentionally.
Meanwhile, he would somehow continue the conversation as if nothing had happened.
Day by day, he became part of my routine.
A notification I expected.
A conversation I looked forward to.
A person whose opinion suddenly mattered.
And then one day, he said something that completely caught me off guard.
He told me he wasn't really interested in being "just friends."
If something more could happen between us, he was open to it.
If not, then he wasn't looking for friendship for the sake of friendship.
I remember panicking.
Not externally.
Internally.
Because suddenly things felt real.
Before that, everything had been easy.
Messages.
Songs.
Conversations.
Now there was a possibility.
And possibilities are terrifying.
Especially when you don't know what you want.
I immediately went to my friends.
Like every confused girl in history.
I explained the situation.
Overanalyzed every message.
Read too much into everything.
And returned even more confused than before.
Eventually, I told him to slow down.
To hold his horses.
To give things time.
Which, unsurprisingly, led to another argument.
At that point, I genuinely wondered if this was the end.
Again.
But then something happened that had become strangely common between us.
He came back.
And so did I.
A few days later, while we were talking, I told him something I hadn't really thought through before saying.
"Just focus on your studies. Your exams are coming up. I'm not going anywhere."
Even now, I don't know why I said it.
Maybe it was because I trusted him.
Maybe it was because I knew he'd come back.
Or maybe, without realizing it, I'd already started making space for him in my life
Maybe I had already started caring more than I was willing to admit.
Whatever the reason was, the words came naturally.
And for the first time, staying seemed easier than walking away.
Because despite all the misunderstandings, all the disappearing acts, and all the unnecessary arguments, neither of us seemed very good at staying away.
And without realizing it, we were standing on the edge of something neither of us had expected.
Something bigger than story replies.
Bigger than songs.
Bigger than friendship.
The funny part??
I still had no idea what was coming.
He did.
I didn't.
Because while I was busy trying to figure out my feelings...
He was secretly planning our first date.
Write a comment ...